Mexican Hot Chocolate

Well, fellow Southerners, The Polar Vortex is upon us. Or what the rest of the world knows simply as winter.

While my dentist tells me he “doesn’t believe in global warning and all that hippie crap,” he sure does believe that it’s “cold as a witch’s t*tty” right now, and I would have to agree. About the cold; Not about choosing to ignore science.

In honor of my dentist, here’s a drink that’s the liquid equivalent of a cavity. It’s hot, spicy, strong and chocolate, much like my girl Sophia from Orange Is The New Black. Let this keep you warm until she returns.

(Which will be “sometime in 2014.” Netflix, you are a flippity trick but I. LUV. U.)

Disclosure: The non-boozy version of this drink was originally published in Southern Living, but according to our bylaws, we cannot publish beverages that do not have an alcoholic option, thus the hooch.

3 cups milk
1 cinnamon stick
3 tbps unsweetened cocoa
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 (3.5-oz.) chili chocolate bar, chopped
1/4 tsp chili powder
1 shot Kahlua or Bailey’s per mug
1 cup heavy cream (optional)
1 tbsp powdered sugar (optional)

1. Mix everything but booze and cream and cook over low heat until chocolate is melted.
2. Mix heavy cream and powdered sugar in a separate bowl and whip (ideally with a stick blender because it is so much easier and you don’t want to get The Carpal Tunnel).
3. Pour hot chocolate into glasses, add liquor and garnish with cream and a cinnamon stick.

Fire Cider

If you have ever heard the song “I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas,” you will appreciate why I am considering booze at noon.

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Fireball. Now with slightly more class & less judgment.

Of all the adult beverages we have here at Nummy, this one is the simplest and most seasonal.

Even better – It’s the fastest way to get Fireball into your system since Matt Hinson moved back to Memphis.

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1/2 gallon apple cider
1 orange
12 cloves
4 cinnamon  sticks
1 star anise (optional)
Fireball to taste
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1. Stud your orange with cloves (i.e. jam cloves into the outside of an orange).
2. Simmer all ingredients except Fireball for 30 minutes. (Reminder: Star anise tastes like liquorice, so if you Hate Licorice like I do, skip it.)
3. Strain and add desired amount of Fireball. Serving suggestions per mug are as follows:
   1. One splash for fuzzy memories
   2. One shot for slightly sloppy
   3. Two shots for telling your sister what you really think of her boyfriend
4. Garnish each mug with a cinnamon stick and a slice of orange peel.

Brantley Milk Punch

Yes, Nummy neglects, I’ve decided the first post in more than a year deserves to be the first one with the married name. In no small coincidence, this recipe is seasonal and full of alcohol, just like our happy newlywed home.

Milk Punch is basically Egg Nog‘s thinner, livelier cousin, which means Egg Nog hates Milk Punch and is always throwing sideways glances at her at family gatherings.

As the napkin says, let it flow.

But seriously, this drink is easy, delicious and it won’t force you to choose between a seasonal beverage and an extra serving of ham. NEVER force a lady to choose between booze and ham.

Bottom’s up.

2 cups of milk
2 cups of half & half
1 cup bourbon
1/2 cup amaretto liquor
3 tsp vanilla
3/4 cup powdered sugar
Whole nutmeg

1. Pour all ingredients except powdered sugar and nutmeg into a pitcher and stir.
2. Whisk in powdered sugar.
3. Serve over ice and grate fresh nutmeg on top.

These should be served in seasonal glasses. If you don’ have seasonal glasses, exit this blog immediately and never return.

Michelada ~ Cinco de Mayo 2K12

Yeah, so it’s pretty clear from the title of this post that I’m about a month late in getting around to it…

Garden & Gun

But it’s never too late for a beer-based beverage! Especially one that acts as a welcome substitute for a Bloody Mary when the summer is too sticky for tomato juice but you still need something to knock last night’s fog out.

The basic version of this drink is just lime juice and beer, but The Chef pointed me toward a Garden & Gun recipe that uses soy and Worcestershire, and my salt addiction rejoiced. (If you are not a sodium addict, you can control the amount by limiting the sauce additions.)

So if you like to drink anything bloody (Mary or Beer – this is not a vampire reference), try this out on Memorial Day. It’s an icy, refreshing change of pace. Ole!

1 beer (Mexican preferably, but anything without too strong a flavor will do)
2 limes, juiced
hot sauce
dash of soy sauce
dash of Worcestershire
dash of spices (like Tony’s)
Kosher salt

1. Run a lime wedge around your glass and rim with salt.
2. Fill halfway with ice.
3. Add all ingredients, saving beer for last.
4. Stir and slurrrrrrrp. Salty goodness.

Smartini ~ Basil & Acai Berry Cocktail

My brother Martin is finally getting hitched, so I figured we needed a stout yet sassy beverage for his engagement party. In the name of printing up (completely unnecessary but adorable) little St. Patrick’s Day menu cards, this cocktail was named “the Smartini” as a Martin/Sarah mashup.

healthline.com

As a general rule, I think most dudes will drink a fruity cocktail as long as it:

1. isn’t bright pink
2. uses some sort of unorthodox ingredient, and
3. doesn’t come in a fancy cocktail glass that makes you inclined to raise a pinkie.

And this cocktail passes all of those tests. The Acai Berry liquor is a trendy new kind of booze we had in Charleston while dining at Cypress (the oysters, OH THE OYSTERS!), and The Chef and I are pretty much basil sluts on every level, so this was a no-brainer.

While I didn’t squeeze the 3 dozen lemons it would have required to make a pitcher of this stuff, if I were making smaller batches, I’d definitely use the fresh stuff. Also, this has agave nectar in it, which is just nature’s fancy-sounding answer to Splenda, so do not be afraid.

The bottom line: this was refreshing and delectable, so throw it in your spring rotation.

2 parts Acai berry liquor (Veev)
1 part fresh lemon juice
1 part agave nectar
2 parts club soda
1 package basil, roughly chopped
cucumbers and lemons, sliced for garnish

1. Pour your Acai berry liquor in a pitcher or tupperware container. Add basil. Let steep for 1-4 days, depending on desired strength of basil flavor.
2. Combine all ingredients and chill.

I made this in a much larger quantity – i.e. used two bottles of Veev and increased amounts of the other ingredients proportionally – and that worked very well. Put it in a pitcher and dress it up with the cucumbers and lemons, and you got one pretty and potent cocktail.

Akin Hot Damn Cider

craftyladyabby.blogspot.com

Despite the long absence from you, Num, I have returned. And I have brought with me the spoils of my annual Ripley Christmas trip.

Namely, the somewhat hyped and super delicious cider recipe from Uncle Stewart’s tailgate… and Akin Oyster Dressing. (I’m still debating the morality of posting that second one since it took me several years to annoy my cousin Melissia and Aunt Sylvia into relinquishing it, so time will have to tell on that one.)

For the moment, this simple sipping cocktail will have to suffice. And I guarantee it will quench any thirst, a winter one especially.

Cider Spices
Apple Cider or Juice
Hot Damn

1. Mix cider and spices as directed on package. (Incidentally, the spices come in an adorable milk carton package, so this drink is both cute and yummy.)
2. Add Hot Damn to taste.
3. Heat (do not boil) and imbibe.

Classic Egg Nog ~ Christmas 2K11

We’re officially halfway through December, and we’d be remiss not to deliver some Nog directives right about now.

Some people wait until Christmas to serve up the quality stuff, but I say boo to that. On Christmas, you’re already off work, all the presents have been bought, and you’re pretty much required to eat yourself sick. Why do you need another special treat then?

No, I say we start the nogging now. Because now is the time Christmas is most likely making you her whipping boy with the travel planning, present buying and general insanity of the masses. Sidebar: Have you been to the kids’ toy section at Target lately? Yesterday I got simultaneously boxed out by a redneck looking for LEGOs and almost got run over by a lady in a Hoverround. Merry Freaking Christmas, shoppers!

Anywho, this recipe is from Joy of Cooking, the most classic of all classic cookbooks. It’s simple and delicious. And no, it will not give you salmonella so stop being such a pansy and drink up.

12 eggs (separated)
1 lb confectioner’s sugar
4-8 cups dark rum, brandy, bourbon or rye*
2 quarts whipping cream

1. Separate eggs and beat yolks until light in color.
2. Gradually beat in confectioner’s sugar.
3. Add very slowly 2 cups rum (or other liquor).
4. Let stand one hour to dispel the “eggy” taste and destroy possibility of salmonella.
5. Add, beating constantly, 2-4 cups more of liquor and 2 qts whipping cream.
6. Refrigerate 3 hours.
7. Beat 8-12 egg whites until stiff but not dry and fold into mixture.
8. Serve sprinkled with freshly grated nutmeg.

*The Chef suggests half rum/half brandy. 2 boozes=twice the fun!

**12/20/2011 Update: I actually went to the trouble to make this last week, and it got rave – I mean RAVE – reviews. I used all three liquors, and I think that was well worth its minimal trouble. Make twice as much as you think you need.

JR’s Bourbon Slush

While it will undoubtedly unnerve JR that we are prematurely posting a drink that is obviously a spring/summer beverage on this cold, nasty day, sometimes you need a ray of sunlight at the end of the tunnel to get you through. (Geez, mixed metaphors much? I am NOT on my A-game today folks.)

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The Chef says this recipe is a St. Simon’s classic. Sounds to me like Sneaky Punch‘s slushy Southern cousin. And that simply cannot be bad.

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2 6oz frozen lemonade concentrate, thawed

1 6oz can frozen orange juice concentrate, thawed

3/4 cup lemon juice

2.5 cups bourbon

1 2-liter of 7up/Sprite

1. Mix all ingredients.
2. Freeze for 8 hours.
3. Get slushed.

Blue Ribbon Margarita

Buenos Dias ‘rita lovers. Today I bring you a recipe that has been a long time coming. (I realize the typical Mardi Gras drink of choice is a Hurricane, but those are a tad sweet for my taste, so I’m sticking to what I know.) This fantastic concoction won the Margarita Contest at Sarah’s house last October, and it has been dancing around my brain ever since. If I recall correctly, people actually fought over who got to drink the last of it.

I, of course, was above such petty bickering. Possibly because I may have been tipped off about which chip I needed to pull from the bag in order to land a slot as a judge. And you know what? I’m not sorry. Margaritas and me go way back, and it would have been a crime against tequila for me not to have been involved.

Anyway, Sarah was kind enough to get this recipe for us from her friend Pete Young, so you don’t even have to lie and cheat to get your hands on one.

6 shots tequila
2 shots Grand Marnier (or Gran Gala as Meeks suggested)
4 tbsp lime juice, freshly squeezed
2 shots simple syrup
Splenda
salt

1. Make the simple syrup. (This simple syrup is unique for 2 reasons: (1) you use Splenda rather than sugar to make it, and (2) it’s 2 parts Splenda to 1 part water, meaning it will be sweeter than traditional simple syrups.)
   To make this, simply boil water and add Splenda, stirring until dissolved and slightly thickened. (I’d probably do 2 cups Splenda and 1 cup water because you can hang on to the leftover syrup for a few weeks.)
2. Mix together simple syrup and rest of the ingredients. Pour into salt-rimmed glass and bask in the goodness. (These proportions should make about 3 margaritas.)

The most time-consuming (but also most crucial) part of this recipe is juicing the limes, so you may want to buy a juicer, hunker down and get some done in advance if you’re serving these at a party. People will want seconds, so it pays to be totally juiced. Like The-Situation-juiced. GTL MVP!

La Croixlermaker

Our latest submission from the mid-state is unique in that it involves how to help yourself get over a rough night rather than help you get started with one. I’m not a huge pomegranate fan, but Charlie’s concoction does sound like it would hit the spot after a long night. Looking forward to many more of his submissions – chicken salad on Cape Cod chips, anyone?

From mixologist Charlie: Doesn’t get more basic than this.

1 can grapefruit-flavored La Croix
1 bottle POM pomegranate juice

1. All you need is a can of La Croix (preferably grapefruit) and some of that POM pomegranate juice. The can is key, so no glass bottles. Pop open the can, pour a little bit of the La Croix out, a little POM in, and voila.
2. If those instructions are too difficult for you, just follow ol’  Coach Buttermaker’s technique.

Chased down with some BC Headache Powder, this is one of the better hangover cures I’ve found that doesn’t include alcohol…if you’re into that sort of thing. PWEEF!